68 Days

My sleepovers at Kelly's house have continued into this week. His mother's fiance is supposed to return by the end of this week, which means the fun sleepovers and dinners at his house are going to screech to a hault as soon as he pulls into the neighborhood. It's a fact of life, I guess. I really dislike sleeping alone after spending 3+ days sleeping curled up next to the man that I love.

There are 68 days Kel has left as a free man, but only 18 left here in Colorado with our average high school life and schedule. It's an extremely... disheartening amount of days left. I try so hard to make the best of the rest of the time--I want him to experience things with me, make lasting memories with me--but, I feel like it's almost impossible to accomplish. We've spent 15 months in a fantastic relationship together, and I realize that I'm placing a lot on these next mere 18 days. They're the last days of the normalcy we've known for our entire relationship, and I want to savor it before everything changes. It's a large stress that I'm willing dumping on myself; I know that I would absolutely regret it if I didn't have this attitude and blew off these 18 days.

Sunday night I couldn't fall asleep to save my life. I blamed it on being alone in my bed after those previous five days at Kelly's, but I knew better. I had 1,002 things on my mind, all of them needed to be done this week and I was ready to get up and get it all done at that split second. This happens when I start getting really stressed and on edge, and sure enough, I had a knot in my stomach the next day.

I had my Monday afternoon planned perfectly. Kelly was to be at the recruiter's station and I was going to go to the bank, buy a new pair of tweezers, go tan for 15 minutes, get home and shower, and then start my list of "College To-Do's". I finished at the bank and was picking out the tweezaers I wanted when I got a call from Kelly, saying that his recruiters infact didn't bring a spare computer for him to take tests on and there wasn't a need for him to be there. I was thinking: Well fuck me sideways! I needed those four hours to get shit done so I didn't toss and trun through another night of sleep. Fuckin' a! I said: "Ok babe. I'm at Sally's. I'm going to tan after this and I'll be out in 20." And, just my luck, the Sally's employee was training that day and it took her ten minutes to check me out. I sprinted over to the tanning salon a few stores down to learn that it was going to be an eight minute wait for my tanning bed; Kelly was stalled outside the door, so I turned around and got in his car, went home and packed a bag for the night, and went back to his house.

We spent the entire evening watching Dexter on Netflix. I started that series last Thursday and have almost finished the second season. I absolutely love it, and, as of last night, so does Kel. He said he was watching it with me so I'd have someone to talk to about it, but I'm pretty sure he was hooked when he learned Sgt. Doakes is a former Army Ranger. I was really excited to learn what he did in the military, and Kelly pointed out "Hey, he's still alive. Does that make you happy?" Well, yes. Seeing men who have lived through Ranger training hell and the dangerous Ranger missions make me very happy. One Ranger killing his wife and Sgt. Doakes leaving his wife because he was afraid of killing her, however, aren't uber comforting...

We finished episode 19 or 20 at 9:15ish... I think. There were about twenty minutes left when Kelly started to show me that he wanted... personal time on the couch. Personal time that was so... memorable it should go down in history... ended at, like, 10:15. We rinsed off in the shower and crawled into bed until 6:17 this morning.

Now I'm in my Computer Applications class without an assignment left to do. I've got an appointment with the oral surgeon who will extract my wisdom teeth today at 1:45. I've been directed by Kel to wait to get them taken out until he's in Illinois because my surgeries stress him out. To be honest, I wouldn't want to waste this time on my recovery anyway. I'm going back to his house for, what I believe is, the last night there this week... possibly forever. Nostalgic, much?